{"id":104456,"date":"2024-07-04T16:24:33","date_gmt":"2024-07-04T14:24:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kosovotwopointzero.com\/djali-jem-i-mire\/"},"modified":"2024-07-22T16:21:23","modified_gmt":"2024-07-22T14:21:23","slug":"my-good-boy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.kosovotwopointzero.com\/en\/my-good-boy\/","title":{"rendered":"\u2018My good boy\u2019"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"104456\" class=\"elementor elementor-104456 elementor-103219\" data-elementor-post-type=\"post\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-d94e51e elementor-section-full_width elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"d94e51e\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-background-overlay\"><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div 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class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-15399ad elementor-section-full_width elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"15399ad\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-no\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-294218d\" data-id=\"294218d\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-f708219 elementor-widget elementor-widget-image\" data-id=\"f708219\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"image.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<img width=\"1920\" height=\"900\" src=\"https:\/\/archive.kosovotwopointzero.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/Lidiona.png\" class=\"attachment-full size-full wp-image-103224\" alt=\"\" loading=\"lazy\" srcset=\"https:\/\/archive.kosovotwopointzero.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/Lidiona.png 1920w, https:\/\/archive.kosovotwopointzero.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/Lidiona-300x141.png 300w, https:\/\/archive.kosovotwopointzero.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/Lidiona-1024x480.png 1024w, https:\/\/archive.kosovotwopointzero.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/Lidiona-768x360.png 768w, https:\/\/archive.kosovotwopointzero.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/Lidiona-1536x720.png 1536w, https:\/\/archive.kosovotwopointzero.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/Lidiona-326x153.png 326w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1920px) 100vw, 1920px\" \/>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-7652469 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"7652469\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-background-overlay\"><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-no\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-dd7674f\" data-id=\"dd7674f\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-92c2de7 elementor-align-center elementor-mobile-align-center elementor-widget elementor-widget-button\" data-id=\"92c2de7\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"button.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-button-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-button elementor-button-link elementor-size-xs\" href=\"https:\/\/kosovotwopointzero.com\/en\/tag\/hovi-yne-rinor-en-2\/\" target=\"_blank\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-content-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-text\">DARING YOUTH<\/span>\n\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-6d89053 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"6d89053\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-9b05912\" data-id=\"9b05912\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4133716 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"4133716\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">\u2018My good boy\u2019\n<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-025a35b elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"025a35b\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">A list of questions that I am trying to answer. \n<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-a8c5dfd elementor-widget-divider--view-line elementor-widget elementor-widget-divider\" data-id=\"a8c5dfd\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"divider.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-divider\">\n\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-divider-separator\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-be63c62 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"be63c62\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><a href=\"https:\/\/kosovotwopointzero.com\/en\/author\/lidionamarovci\/\" style=\"border-bottom: 1.3px solid yellow;\" target=\"_blank\">By Lidiona Marovci <\/a>  | July 6, 2024<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-b881c95 elementor-shape-square elementor-grid-0 e-grid-align-center elementor-widget elementor-widget-social-icons\" data-id=\"b881c95\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"social-icons.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-social-icons-wrapper elementor-grid\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-grid-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-icon elementor-social-icon elementor-social-icon-facebook elementor-repeater-item-5e387e1\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Kosovo2.0\/\" target=\"_blank\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-screen-only\">Facebook<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<i class=\"fab fa-facebook\"><\/i>\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-grid-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-icon elementor-social-icon elementor-social-icon-twitter elementor-repeater-item-7ae3a81\" href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/kosovo2point0\" target=\"_blank\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-screen-only\">Twitter<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<i class=\"fab fa-twitter\"><\/i>\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-grid-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-icon elementor-social-icon elementor-social-icon-instagram elementor-repeater-item-8daffd8\" href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/kosovo2point0\/\" target=\"_blank\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-screen-only\">Instagram<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<i class=\"fab fa-instagram\"><\/i>\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-aebedd5 elementor-widget-divider--view-line_text elementor-widget-divider--element-align-center elementor-widget elementor-widget-divider\" data-id=\"aebedd5\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"divider.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-divider\">\n\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-divider-separator\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-b06875d elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"b06875d\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-5fb39f6\" data-id=\"5fb39f6\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6220491 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"6220491\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I am 22 years old, and over the years, my successes have been acknowledged with just one sentence, \u201cMy good boy.\u201d In principle, this phrase conveys pride and appreciation. However, if you take a closer look at its implications and the underlying issue it represents, you\u2019ll realize it\u2019s not necessarily desirable.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I have often thought about expressing my disapproval, but the context and the motives behind that sentence made me stay silent and simply appreciate it.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For years, I have made significant achievements that are somewhat ambitious for my age \u2014 apologies for the lack of modesty.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You might find my apology unnecessary, but in our patriarchal society, women are expected to be simple and modest. We are told to be reticent and not react. When we ask, the answer is often simple, almost natural: \u201cbecause we are girls.\u201d We\u2019re constantly asked to stay quiet, even when we achieve something, do housework or take care of others. This expectation is especially strong when it comes to prioritizing ourselves or standing up for ourselves when we\u2019re hurt, simply because of our gender.<\/span><\/p><p><b>Wondering why?<\/b><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">With every success of mine, I have always wanted to make my father proud and it worked \u2014 he was proud. He expressed his pride with a single sentence: &#8216;Well done, my boy.&#8217;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Looking back now, with my current mindset, it\u2019s strange I used to accept this with a hug and a faint smile.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-bf06d08 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"bf06d08\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">You might ask if I\u2019ve achieved something that only boys can do, but that hasn\u2019t been the case.<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-0658fe9 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"0658fe9\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When I mention my current mindset, I am not referring to academic achievements, which are something everyone can achieve and are often influenced by personal standards and social circles. Instead, I\u2019m referring to who I am on a societal level. This arises from being in certain situations, listening to others&#8217; experiences and sometimes accepting things as they are, even though they may not align with my own beliefs. Or maybe this comes from a lack of courage to express differing viewpoints from what we have been taught.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You might ask if I\u2019ve achieved something that only boys can do, but that hasn\u2019t been the case. Instead, after every success, I\u2019ve encountered a specific sentence, and its frequency has gradually reinforced acceptance. Sometimes, when you think differently from your environment, you feel like you don&#8217;t belong, so you try to fit in. Worse, you might even try to remain in that environment. The comfort of belonging to a group can often outweigh the courage required to stand alone with a different opinion, especially at a young age.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Currently, I have many unanswered questions in my mind. A lack of courage and shyness prevent me from asking them out loud for fear of judgment. This fear is closely linked to the modesty that we are taught early on, which then leads to a reluctance to voice our concerns. Refusing or not initiating such conversations also comes from the inferiority complex that society tries to instill in us, suggesting that silence is more appropriate than the willingness to have such conversations.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, here are some questions that perhaps hold the answers:<\/span><\/p><ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Does this come from families\u2019 relentless desire for each child to be a boy, characterized by his physical strength?<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Does this happen due to people\u2019s remarkable capacity to adapt to a certain mindset, coupled with the inability or even unwillingness to resist it?<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is it because girls have always been expected to achieve less, due to the responsibilities and obligations they have to bear from an early age?<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is this simply a form of parental bragging, without any deeper intentions?<\/span><\/li><\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are many questions on various levels that can make the answer to each question more complicated. However, we must explore these levels. Sometimes, the change we need at home, at school, in society and beyond, begins with asking questions.<\/span><\/p><p><b>Maybe, today is the time to start<\/b><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I believe it&#8217;s important to consider opinions on this issue within a historical context, as history may also play a role in why this happens. An incomprehensible desire for a large number of male successors and the belief that only they can replace the current generation, is just one reason.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When asking why this happens, the general opinion is that it doesn\u2019t apply to all age groups and is mainly prevalent in older generations. If this question were asked to a friend of mine, they\u2019d likely respond with something like, \u201cThis is just an outdated and provincial mentality.\u201d But for me, the answer is simply that it will take a lot of time.\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But if you were to ask this question to my 86-year-old grandmother, you might quickly find the conversation over, as her response might be along the lines of, \u201cWhy would you want girls?\u201d<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As for my father, I think his views on the matter are somewhat hidden. He would likely say that it\u2019s only a nickname to express his love, although I do not clearly understand the reasoning behind this particular nickname.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In this situation, a different type of courage is required.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Maybe it&#8217;s not a problem, maybe it&#8217;s just a temporary belief, but I will still be my father&#8217;s &#8220;good son.&#8221; I hope this way of thinking doesn\u2019t persist further or find support from others. We have only taken small steps towards progress, which unfortunately allows this attitude to endure a little longer.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is not that this way of being talked to has a certain impact, because I have faced and heard other situations similar to this, but there is a clash with the way I have molded myself, my feminist beliefs and sense of self.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Perhaps persistently addressing this issue could change it, but it would take time. Maybe now is the time to start.<br \/><br \/><\/span><\/p><p><b>Feature Image: Majlinda Hoxha \/ K2.0.<\/b><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-cec80e2 elementor-section-full_width elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"cec80e2\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-cb8da22\" data-id=\"cb8da22\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-9791cb2 elementor-widget-divider--view-line_icon elementor-view-default elementor-widget-divider--element-align-center 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